Sunday, 17 September 2017

#30 Fobia

Salam and hey

Today im gonna talk about fear. Everyobe has it, and not everyone has proper channel or way to vent it all out or counter those phobias.

Well i have one, at least im aware the most

My phobia, or my worries are basically

Getting too attached to someone,

Meaning

I am gettting scared of losing people i care about.

This is why I always draws a line

In hoping that i will not cross it

In fear of i will not anticipated a huge disappointment

Because my heart gets shattered everytime

When a person walks away from my life

Forever.

That is why i drew the line

To not get my hopes high

Just to let die in the middle of the road

Because

Ive seen much, Ive heard enough

Or maybe
Just maybe

Im better off alone.

Just maybe.

Until today,

Ive not find any way yet to overcome this fear

That has been eating my souls for so many years now

But

I always believe that someone

Will let me out from this vicious cycle

Because I believe in faith and hopes.

What a dreamer, am I?

#29 Pergi Je

Salam and hey,

This post is dedicated to all people whom I care significantly, or insignificantly in my life.

If I do love you, I really do, and I mean it evey word I say.

But if you keep igoring me, somehow every people on earth will eventually become tired, including me.

I hate to say this, but you are just wasting both of our time.

I tried so hard to get to you and you acted as if I was nothing to you.

For that, I have neither strength or interest to keep this relationship going.

I just wish someone to love and like me the way I like and love her, too.

Love works both ways, not just one journey.

Im sorry

When time is gone, you will never able to see me again.

Goodbye

Tuesday, 29 August 2017

#34 Berehat dari Perpecahan (literal meaning)

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did
It has not healed with time
It just shot down my spine _ You look so beautiful tonight
Remind me how you laid us down
And gently smiled before you destroyed my life
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart?
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart?
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
You got much closer than I thought you did
I'm in your reach
You held me in your hands
But could you find it in your heart?
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart?
To make it go away
And let me rest in pieces

Monday, 28 August 2017

#33 Siren berkumandang

Saturated, mess, blur.

In this instance, I'll take everything in this life.

Wednesday, 23 August 2017

#32 Lukisan yang terindah

Sometimes it feels like I don't really know what's going on,
Time and time again it feels like everything is wrong in here.

#31 Growing Up

Growing up,

I never thought it was this far,
Whenever I looked back,
There is always this feeling,
Missing out,
The people,
The moments,
The memories,
That tight up so much
That I do not even thought
Of much it felt
When everything is gone
Everyone is leaving
While the heart remembers
Every single thing
The ache of remembering is so real

Growing up,

It was the best ever thing,
If, and only if,
It stays forever
The people,
The one I wish to stay
To be my strength,
To be my catalyst,
Moving forward,
To feel that everything, anything,
Seems possible with them,
Standing side by side
The glory,
The eager of feeling that he can do much more,
Everything seems borderless,
With their smiles ignite
Do make me smile too
Eventually it was a dream,
At least for now,
Blur,
Blunt,
Clueless,
Hazy,
Confused.

Growing up,

Is still a battle of mine,
Marching forward,
To see the infinity direction,
To not be deceived by temptation,
To give up,
To feel low,
To look small,
To stop,
For it is only the beginning,
Of something bigger
More wonderful,
More meaningful,
Of who am I
To walk through endless torns,
To step on edgy pavements,
To trudge along the muddy mud,
To crawl under the narrow road
To find purpose of life,
To find my direction,
To find myself.

Oh God, you are the only one I had left
No, from the start.
It was only you. Please guide your humble servant to the way You wanted.
If You permits,
Let me have an ease mind and heart
At least, I know
That it does happened and
The memories are mine to keep
That is all.

Saturday, 19 August 2017

#30 Sugar Rush

You insist to make things harder and even note harder.

I had given my all, at least from what I think. If you want to play games with me, I should have let go a long time ago.

Sometimes, I just feel like giving up. The reason was not there anymore. You were not there anymore.

It should be me. It should have been me. I can't lie. I feel alone.