#41 No picture of you

Hey.

Dusty blog. We meet again.

Couple of times I tried to write an entry but always ended up I lose my motivation and finally this post is here.

Hurray! First post of 2019.

Everything is settling up as usual. Ups and down and so forth.

Moving forward.

I hated to say this, but I have once again being dumped by the people I love, I care.

It is not so unusual, I guess.

Everything I did, everything I worked for, and it turned to be, futile.

Let me cut to the chase.

I get blocked for the reason I could not find.

I just wanted a closure. A real talk. Like a man and a woman.

She declined.

And even shut me down like I was nothing to her, at all.

And, few days ago, she was saying sorry. After all of this, she came back when she could just vanished in thin layer of air.

I was waiting for to text me again so I could drop the bomb.

"Why are you doing this? The last we texted, you crushed and shattered my heart to pieces. literally.

I think she would not even start. She has no reason to do that.

I know.

But who knows? Just in case. I want to spill every thing out. MOFO

Enough of this nonsense.

But I'd still forgive her.

It is the only way I can feel peace.

Even for every heart break I went through.

I just do not want to feel sad, ever again.

Is it so much for me to ask fore?

I wanted her to know that. She looks amazingly beautiful, just like the first time I met her.

I hope I never see her face again.

It is aching.

Just to think about it.

Hillarious.

I love the time we were together.

Even if it was so limited, I'd treasure it for the rest of my life.

Do you know? I hear every song you played on your playlist.

Just to know that you are doing alright.

Take care.